Marriage was a privilege which enabled for greater rights
Higher wages for men
Legal protections
Financial security for women, as their men would provide for them
However, women became a non-legal entity; husbands took over ownership of all their assets (though most women owned little, as prior to marriage their father legally owned their assets)
Was a sort of pact between men and women
Man provides the finances through his “hard work” and a job
Ultimate decision maker and leader of family, though he often consulted the wife come decision time
Expected to be disciplinary force but maintain even temperament
Responsible for safety of family
Was to be a role model for the type of man his daughter should want to marry
Women provides comfort for the man and makes home a warm and loving place through housework
Cook, care for children, sew clothing, laundry, cleaning
Homemaking was an art and privilege women could take pride in doing well
If husband could afford, a maid was often hired to aid homemaking
Were obligated to keep husbands and sons morally in line- not become overly selfish and desire too much sexual intercourse of squander money
Couples who deviated from this pact were rejected as outsiders as it was considered good etiquette of the time
As a result of this so-called “mutually beneficial pact,” the wife became, in a way, trapped in the marriage as they could not provide for themselves should there be a divorce
Divorce was, consequently, almost exclusively initiated by the man
A woman initiating marriage was seen as a hostile destruction of the family
Marriage was about the progression of society, not individual comfort
Therefore, to divorce is a ‘grave and mischievous departure from the requirements of the public interest in the sanctity and permanence of the marriage tie’ as one judge said in 1921
Divorce was highly shameful and very rare (.7 people per 1,000 per year)
Community pressured couples to not divorce as it was not proper etiquette and failure to progress society through the responsibilities of being a spouse
Sometimes community pressure of acceptable social behavior within marriages was the cause of a divorce in the first place, as couples felt they failed society
Marriage was the symbol of maturity and transition to adulthood, as you now properly contribute to society; in a sense, your birth was not a waste
People looked forward to it throughout their youth
Eight people per 1,000 population married per year
Shotgun marriages (one which is forced due to a pregnancy before hand) were common for young married couples
For couples married when 21 and under, 66% of first children were born within 7 months of marriage
For couples married when 25-30, only 25% of first children were born within 7 months of marriage
Median marriage age for men was about 26.5 and for women 23.5
Why did Ethan and Zeena not divorce?
Divorce was not an option for Ethan nor Zeena because due to underlying community pressure about the rules and purpose of marriage. In the early 1900’s, marriage was seen not as a path to express one’s love for another, but as a passage to adulthood for the progression of society. In a “proper” marriage, the husband and wife together were to raise their children following set gender roles. The male was to serve as an even-tempered role model for like whom his daughter should marry someday, provide financial support, and discipline children when necessary. He was the ultimate decision maker of the family: confident, decisive, and a leader (though he was also expected to consult to wife regarding major decisions). Ethan failed this role of marriage. He did not provide any children for Zeena, was not decisive or confident, and did not provide financial support. A divorce would have required him to not only fully accept his failure, but would also result in the community discovering his failure of society. He could not face the shame he would have to bear, not only for leaving Zeena financially alone, but for failing to progress society through a ‘proper’ marriage. Zeena, likewise, failed her marital role. Women of the time were to cook delicious meals, keep the house cozy and inviting, and keep their husband morally in line through their love. Zeena was too sick to cook, too tired for housemaking, and too cranky to devote herself to Ethan. She too could not face the shame which would come upon her should she divorce; Zeena failed society because she failed her marriage.
Notes on Marriage
Why did Ethan and Zeena not divorce?
Divorce was not an option for Ethan nor Zeena because due to underlying community pressure about the rules and purpose of marriage. In the early 1900’s, marriage was seen not as a path to express one’s love for another, but as a passage to adulthood for the progression of society. In a “proper” marriage, the husband and wife together were to raise their children following set gender roles. The male was to serve as an even-tempered role model for like whom his daughter should marry someday, provide financial support, and discipline children when necessary. He was the ultimate decision maker of the family: confident, decisive, and a leader (though he was also expected to consult to wife regarding major decisions). Ethan failed this role of marriage. He did not provide any children for Zeena, was not decisive or confident, and did not provide financial support. A divorce would have required him to not only fully accept his failure, but would also result in the community discovering his failure of society. He could not face the shame he would have to bear, not only for leaving Zeena financially alone, but for failing to progress society through a ‘proper’ marriage. Zeena, likewise, failed her marital role. Women of the time were to cook delicious meals, keep the house cozy and inviting, and keep their husband morally in line through their love. Zeena was too sick to cook, too tired for housemaking, and too cranky to devote herself to Ethan. She too could not face the shame which would come upon her should she divorce; Zeena failed society because she failed her marriage.
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